


Constant light

by ONeillwith2ls



Series: Episode tags [3]
Category: Stargate SG-1
Genre: Episode: s01e09 Brief Candle, F/M, Not graphical but discussions of, Past Rape/Non-con
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-18
Updated: 2020-10-18
Packaged: 2021-03-09 02:47:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,227
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27087337
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ONeillwith2ls/pseuds/ONeillwith2ls
Summary: When Sam hears the full story, she remembers how she felt, not that he'd ever talk about it, but she wants him to know, she's on his side.
Relationships: Samantha "Sam" Carter/Jack O'Neill, Samantha "Sam" Carter/Jonas Hanson
Series: Episode tags [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1652002
Comments: 5
Kudos: 53





	Constant light

**Author's Note:**

> In all the hussle this morning---I forgot I had this! 
> 
> Takes place after Brief Candle S01E09

“Oh um--sorry guys--” Sam said blushing as she saw half a dozen half naked colleagues still in the changing room. “I just need my jacket.” she said quietly.

“We’re all decent captain.” one of them said to her. “Just come in and get it. Its meant to be the women’s changing any minute anyway."

Sam blushed slightly but didn’t ignore the offer, they were all clothed enough, so she headed towards her locker located next to the Colonel’s who currently stood shirtless. “Sir.” she acknowledged opening her locker.

“So Captain, how you finding the missions?” one of them asked her.

“Oh fine. A bit strange at times, but good on the whole.” she nodded.

“I bet the Colonel finds it a bit more then fine.” another one said a smirk at his lips and a couple of others followed suit.

“I’m--umm--” she looked at the Colonel who was looking into his locker quietly. He aging process had reversed, he maybe had one or two more grey hairs then he did before, but he looked good with it, then mission had gone quickly south from eating a local cake to intergalactic sex to the worse STD ever! “I’m not sure what you mean.” she tried delicately.

“Does he have a girl on each planet?” the same one smirked.

“Knock it off.” Jack finally said after some vigorous laughing from the other, Sam looked at him concerned, he wasn’t behaving like himself.

“Was she hot?” one of the airman asked.

“I said knock it off.” Jack tried again. Sam looked worried towards her commanding officer by his tone, she could tell he would snap at them and soon.

“I heard she was twenty one days old fully developed--” another chirped up.

“I was drugged!” Jack finally snapped. 

“Right!” one smirked “sex with a hot women with no consequences sounds like a real ordeal.”

“I didn’t have a say in the matter, I was drugged and I can’t remember what until--” he looked down to his t-shirt before he put it over his head “There’s a dismissal for whoever brings it up next.” he muttered before he slammed his locker shut and walked out.

They waited until Jack had left the room and started talking amongst themselves, Sam continued collecting her items thinking about what he had just said. She hadn’t realised the drug had made him unaware of what was happening when he bedded Kynthia, she looked down and felt the blush rise to her cheeks as she reached for her keys and put them in her jacket pocket.

“What do you think Captain?” one of them asked her.

Sam looked around “I think you’re all jerks.” she said slamming her own locker and leaving the room. 

* * *

Sam stood at his door, not sure what exactly it was she was doing there, but felt she should, or maybe could talk to him about this. He opened the door and eyed her up and down.

“Captain?” he questioned her.

“I um---” she looked at him and swallowed back the lump in her throat before she said “Those guys were being jerks in the locker room today.” she said quietly.

He simply shrugged, not sure what else to do. “It’s why I drink beer, they’ll stop talking about it before I finish.”

Sam frowned in thought for a moment before she said. “I just came to say, I--umm--” she was really shrugging with finding the words “I’m umm, I’m glad you got along with Kynthia in the end.” she told her. He continued to looked at her baffled by her line of thought, he was about to give up and close the door when she blurted “But it doesn’t amke it easier.” she added.

“Excuse me?” he asked her, still genuinely not knowing where she was going with this.

She took a deep breath and closed her eyes while she said “Jonas and I, right at the very end of our relationship we umm, hadn’t in a while and he was impatient, so he umm, he laced my drink with something one night, the next morning I woke and I found out he had--and--” she took a deep breath and studied her shoes more. “Its not so much the drugging or even the sex which sticks, you know you get over it, because we’ve all drank so much we forget stuff and we’ve had sex, I mean you’d probably have chosen or at least like to have had--” she trailed then shook her head abandoning that line of thought “I know you were married, and you're probably not over that yet--"Sam shook her head hoping to clear it of the bad case of verbal diarrhoea she was currently experiencing. "But the thing which really hurts, and sticks with you is the violation. It must be harder for you because it came from a good place, or at least I hope it did, but it's still a violation.” she said softly. “I ummm I tried to report him afterwards, but all I got from him was that I had consented, I’m not sure how I could but he convinced-- that I did, and I didn’t, I mean I couldn’t so-- I--Um---” she took a couple of deep breaths not daring to look at him if she had she would have seen his face had softened his body language open. She centered herself again and said quietly “I’m not saying you should talk to me about it, I mean you can if you like, but I doubt you would, and you shouldn’t feel like you had to either, but I want you to know, even though it was a little different, I’m saying what no one said to me and I think everyone deserves to hear it in the situation. I believe you, when you said you didn’t have the choice, I believe you, and I will always be on-- I’m on your side.” He took a step forward out onto the decking to meet her and looked down at the struggling captain.

She finally looked up and saw a pair of soft brown eyes melt away her anticipation and his arms came around her in a hug, her arms slid up her bak to embrace him back. “Thank you.” he whispered softly in her ear.

“You’re welcome.” she said equally as quietly as he pulled away. "I can go, if you like." She finished quietly. 

She stepped down the step ready to walk down the path back to her car when he grabbed her wrist and held her in place "You're right." He told her. She looked back confused "about the bit that hurts. You're right." 

"Yeah." She whispered. 

"Yeah." He agreed where they both smiled sadly for a moment. "Come in." He said quietly to her "drink beer with me?"

"Sure." She nodded, where he let go of her wrist and stepped aside.

"You ready for some real beer?" He grinned.

"It'll mean staying longer." She warned him.

"You not okay with that."

"No I am." She smiled moving past him. "Just checking you want me to stay." She told him. 

"Beer, beautiful women, day can't get much better." 

She laughed as he closed the door. She knew he would never mutter a word, but sometimes all you needed was to know you weren't alone.


End file.
